Geoffrey Hoon sacked and sacked again, just for fun.

Lest we forget the Minister of the Substandard Listening to Geoff Hoon on the Today programme this morning, having been sacked from his advisory position in NATO and thrown out of the Labour Party for being caught seeking a 3000 GBP a day job with a lobbying form, he insisted he was "trying to demonstrate my knowledge and experience, background in a...

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How to protect your data (from us)

You should read the following information carefully, then completely destroy the computer you are reading it on.

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HMRC Security Breach: What You Can Do to Protect Yourself From Us

In the light of the recent security breach at Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs (HMRC), The Department of Social Scrutiny (DoSS) has issued the following statement on the subject of Identity Theft (IT) on behalf of The Government. This statement contains vital advice and the answers to a number...

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Frequently Asked FAQs

Can you tell me a little bit about the DoSS website? This website incorporates 150 cubic yards of JavaScript sprayed onto a lightweight superstructure of broken promises and Cryptically-Encoded-Hyperbole (CEH) - the new super-smooth non-stick material that lines the Space Shuttle lavatory and the press briefing room at Downing Street. ...

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Ministry of Truth and Other Information Takes Over Education

The Minister of Truth and Other Information (MOTOI), Alan Bladder, has announced the Department of Social Scrutiny's new 5 year plan for education, following the acquisition of the Ministry for Indoctrination (mFi) in a back street knife fight in Peckham last week. MOTOI will now...

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Identity Cards: Part 3 - Biometric data.

To send this form as an e-card, click here This is the third part of the Government's campaign of ID...

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Your Money and Your Life - Part 2

The Department of Social Scrutiny has unveiled the second part of its thorough investigation into your financial circumstances - Your Money and Your Life.

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The Notwork Rail guide to your railway station.

Ticket Vending Machine Replica of real ticket machine, absolutely correct in every detail, including the fact that it will not dispense tickets. Driven...

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"Keep All Your Old Skin in a Jar", Says Biometric Fraud Tsar.

The Government stepped up its plans to introduce biometric ID cards this morning with the appointment of Alan Bladder, MP as the new Biometric Tsar. Bladder, no stranger to controversy, immediately issued an urgent statement to encourage people to take their dead skin home with them in the interests of National...

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About Your Habitat - Identity Card Application Part 6

The latest part of its Identity Cards Initiative, About Your Habitat will collect details about where you live in order to plan the best route to follow you home. The forms add a twist to the previous techniques of claimant oppression and data-gathering: that of...

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