The Link Between Emotional Intimacy and Better Sex: What Psychology Says

The Link Between Emotional Intimacy and Better Sex: What Psychology Says When it comes to relationships, physical intimacy often gets most of the attention. But psychological research shows that the foundation for truly satisfying sexual experiences is something much deeper: emotional intimacy. What Is Emotional Intimacy? Emotional intimacy is the feeling of being emotionally connected, supported, and safe with your partner. According to Dr. Sue Johnson, the creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), emotional bonds are the foundation that makes romantic relationships thrive. How Emotional Intimacy Affects Sexual Satisfaction Safety and Trust Lead to Vulnerability A 2011 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that higher levels of emotional closeness and trust significantly predict sexual satisfaction among couples. Emotional security encourages openness and freedom during intimate moments. Emotional Connection Strengthens Desire Research led by Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz at the University of Ottawa discovered that extraordinary lovers prioritize emotional connection as a key ingredient for passionate and fulfilling sex. True desire grows when partners feel deeply understood and connected. Communication Enhances Sexual Fulfillment According to a 2017 study in the Journal of Sex Research, couples who engage in open emotional communication report higher levels of sexual satisfaction. Emotional honesty builds trust, reduces anxiety, and strengthens both emotional and physical intimacy. Why Emotional Intimacy Is Often Overlooked In today's fast-paced world, emotional intimacy can easily be neglected. Stress, technology, and unresolved conflicts often create emotional distance between partners, weakening the connection that fuels both emotional and physical passion. How to Build Emotional Intimacy for Better Sex Prioritize Emotional Conversations: Make time for meaningful discussions about feelings, dreams, and fears. Show Affection Outside of Sex: Small acts of love, like hugs and compliments, build emotional security. Practice Active Listening: Truly listen to your partner without judgment or interruption. Be Vulnerable: Share your true self—insecurities, hopes, and dreams—to deepen your bond. Seek Professional Help if Needed: Couples therapy can help rebuild emotional and sexual connection. Conclusion Psychology shows that emotional intimacy isn't just a luxury—it's essential for a passionate and fulfilling sex life. When partners feel emotionally safe, heard, and valued, their physical connection naturally deepens. Investing in emotional closeness leads to not just better sex, but a stronger, more joyful relationship overall.

Posted on: 27 April 2025 | 2:40 pm

Why Smart, Independent Women Struggle with Love And How to Fix It

Why Smart, Independent Women Struggle with Love (And How to Fix It) In today's society, intelligent and independent women are celebrated for their achievements and autonomy. However, many of these women find themselves facing unexpected challenges in their romantic lives. Understanding the underlying reasons can empower them to foster more fulfilling relationships. 1. Societal Expectations and Gender Norms Despite progress in gender equality, traditional norms still influence perceptions of relationships. Studies indicate that some men feel intimidated by women who surpass them in intelligence or success, leading to discomfort in dating scenarios. This dynamic can create barriers for smart women seeking meaningful connections. 2. Emotional Guarding and Vulnerability Highly intelligent individuals often rely on logic and reason, sometimes at the expense of emotional expression. This tendency can result in difficulties with vulnerability, a crucial component of intimate relationships. Embracing emotional openness is essential for building trust and connection. 3. High Standards and Selectivity Smart, independent women often have clear goals and high standards, which can limit their dating pool. While it's important to maintain standards, being overly selective may inadvertently exclude potential partners who could offer meaningful relationships. 4. Strategies for Building Fulfilling Relationships Embrace Vulnerability: Allow yourself to be open and share your feelings. Vulnerability fosters deeper connections. Communicate Openly: Discuss your needs and expectations clearly with potential partners to ensure mutual understanding. Balance Independence and Partnership: While maintaining your autonomy, be open to interdependence, which is vital in relationships. Challenge Societal Norms: Recognize and question traditional gender roles that may hinder your relationship dynamics. Seek Compatible Partners: Look for individuals who appreciate and support your intelligence and independence. By understanding these challenges and implementing these strategies, smart, independent women can navigate the complexities of modern relationships and find fulfilling partnerships.

Posted on: 16 April 2025 | 8:00 am

What He’s Really Thinking: Understanding Male Emotional Expression in Relationships

What He’s Really Thinking: Understanding Male Emotional Expression in Relationships Introduction In relationships, deciphering what a man truly feels can sometimes seem like reading a secret language. Many times, men are socialized to hide their vulnerability, complicating emotional connections. Understanding male emotional expression is crucial for building healthier, more empathetic relationships. The Socialization of Men’s Emotions From a young age, boys are often encouraged to be stoic and self-reliant. Researchers like Kiselica and Englar-Carlson (2010) have noted that societal expectations shape the way men express—or suppress—their emotions. This social conditioning can lead to difficulties in showing vulnerability, which may cause miscommunication in relationships. Research Insights on Male Emotional Expression A 2018 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that men often express emotions indirectly. For example, instead of openly discussing sadness or fear, many men focus on problem-solving as a way to cope. This "action-oriented" coping style can mask inner feelings and lead partners to misinterpret their emotional state. Additionally, research from the American Psychological Association emphasizes that while women tend to elaborate on their feelings, men usually convey emotions through actions. Such differences in communication styles can lead to frustration when one partner expects overt emotional sharing. Furthermore, a 2019 study published in the Journal of Family Psychology revealed that couples who recognize non-verbal emotional cues report higher relationship satisfaction. These findings suggest that by broadening our definition of emotional expression to include subtle signals, we can enhance communication and deepen connections. Common Misinterpretations of Male Emotions A common misconception is that a man’s silence or problem-solving behavior signals indifference. In reality, many men are simply not accustomed to discussing vulnerability in depth. Their indirect approach—through practical actions or subtle gestures—is often their way of saying "I care" without the words. How to Encourage Honest Emotional Communication Creating an environment that promotes open dialogue is key. Here are some strategies supported by research: Create Safe Spaces for Vulnerability: Reassure your partner that every emotion is valid. Normalize vulnerability by acknowledging the societal pressure men often face. Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of a simple "How was your day?" try asking "What was the best part of your day?" to invite thoughtful responses. Appreciate Non-Verbal Cues: Notice his actions, whether he offers help or shows concern when you’re stressed. These gestures often communicate his feelings more clearly than words. Share Your Vulnerability: Open up about your own feelings. Research confirms that mutual emotional sharing strengthens intimacy. Navigating Misunderstandings Even with good intentions, misunderstandings can occur. If you feel your partner is not opening up, approach the subject with curiosity rather than criticism. Remember, for many men, expressing emotions is a learned behavior that improves with time and patience. Conclusion Understanding what a man is really thinking involves recognizing the subtle ways he may express emotion—through actions, small gestures, and reserved words. The research indicates that by appreciating indirect communication and fostering an environment of vulnerability, couples can form deeper and more resilient bonds. In the end, empathy and open communication pave the way for authentic connection.

Posted on: 14 April 2025 | 9:00 am

Should You Stay Friends With Your Ex? The Pros, Cons, and Boundaries

Should You Stay Friends With Your Ex? The Pros, Cons, and Boundaries Breakups are rarely simple. Whether amicable or painful, one question that often lingers is: Should you stay friends with your ex? While some couples transition seamlessly into friendship, for others, the lines blur, leading to confusion, emotional turmoil, or even repeated heartbreak. The truth? There’s no one-size-fits-all answer. But understanding the psychology behind post-breakup friendships can help you make an informed choice. The Pros of Staying Friends With an Ex 1. Emotional Support According to a 2017 study published in Personal Relationships by Dr. Rebecca Griffith, some people remain friends with their exes for practical or emotional reasons—such as continued support and companionship. If the breakup was mutual and respectful, the friendship can provide comfort during transition. 2. Shared History You already know each other well. If the romantic part no longer works but the emotional bond is intact, keeping that connection can be meaningful. 3. Personal Growth When both people have emotionally moved on, staying friends can foster maturity. You learn how to let go of romantic attachment while still caring for someone on a platonic level. The Cons of Staying Friends With an Ex 1. Delayed Healing Psychologist Dr. Gary Lewandowski warns that staying connected to your ex—especially through frequent communication—can slow the healing process and keep you emotionally tethered. 2. Jealousy and New Relationships A 2021 study from Archives of Sexual Behavior found that friendships with exes can cause insecurity or conflict in current relationships, especially if boundaries aren’t clear. 3. Power Imbalances If one person still has feelings and the other doesn’t, this imbalance can lead to resentment or prolonged heartbreak. When It Might Be Okay to Stay Friends The breakup was mutual and respectful. You both genuinely want a platonic bond. Romantic feelings are fully resolved. You’ve had time to emotionally detach. You share responsibilities (e.g., co-parenting). When It’s Better to Walk Away Unresolved romantic feelings remain. The friendship is based on guilt or obligation. Your mental health is suffering. Your current relationship is being affected. The relationship was toxic or abusive. Healthy Boundaries for Staying Friends No romantic or sexual contact. Clear limits on communication. Honesty with new partners. Emotional independence. Take time to heal first. Conclusion Staying friends with an ex can work—but only under the right circumstances. It requires honesty, boundaries, and emotional maturity. Ask yourself: Am I staying friends with my ex because it’s healthy—or because I’m afraid of letting go? If the friendship helps you grow, go for it. But if it’s keeping you stuck, it might be time to move on—for your own peace.Check more EX articles here.

Posted on: 12 April 2025 | 10:37 am

Green Flags to Look for in the Early Stages of Dating

When we start dating someone new, it's easy to hyper-focus on potential red flags. While spotting dealbreakers is important, there's another side to the coin: green flags—the positive signs that someone may be emotionally available, respectful, and a great partner in the making. Recognizing these healthy behaviors early on can help you build trust faster, avoid unnecessary heartache, and make better decisions in your romantic life. 1. They Communicate Clearly and Consistently One of the biggest green flags in the early stages of dating is clear and consistent communication. They reply in a reasonable time, they don’t play games with texting, and they make an effort to stay in touch without making you guess their intentions. 2. They Respect Your Boundaries Whether it's emotional, physical, or time boundaries—when someone respects them without pushback, it’s a very good sign. Healthy partners understand that no means no, and they won’t guilt-trip or pressure you. 3. They're Curious About You (Not Just Surface-Level) If they ask thoughtful questions and genuinely seem interested in your world—your passions, values, and quirks—it shows they’re emotionally invested in you as a person, not just in romance or attraction. 4. They Follow Through on What They Say If someone says they’ll call and they do, or they show up on time and stick to plans, that’s a powerful indicator of emotional maturity and integrity. 5. They're Comfortable With Vulnerability Early emotional openness—like sharing their hopes, fears, or past experiences—demonstrates that they’re not afraid to show up as their authentic self. It also invites emotional safety for you to do the same. 6. They Show Kindness to Others (Not Just You) Watch how they treat service workers, strangers, animals—even their ex. Kindness that extends beyond just romantic interest shows you how they’ll behave in everyday life, not just on dates. 7. They Accept “No” Without Getting Defensive If you say no to a date idea or express a differing opinion and they respond with understanding rather than defensiveness, it’s a clear sign of emotional security. 8. They Talk About the Future in Inclusive Ways We’re not talking about planning your wedding on date three. But if they mention future plans (trips, events, goals) and naturally include you in the picture, it suggests they’re open to long-term potential—not just in it for a fling. 9. You Feel Calm, Not Confused At the start of something healthy, you’re more likely to feel safe and at ease, not anxious or constantly second-guessing where you stand. That emotional calmness is a sign that your nervous system trusts the situation. 10. They Take Accountability If they make a mistake—like showing up late or miscommunicating—and they own it without blame-shifting, that’s gold. Accountability is essential for resolving conflicts in long-term relationships. Final Thoughts: Pay Attention to the Good Stuff While red flags are crucial to identify, focusing only on them can lead to hyper-vigilance or even self-sabotage. Instead, look for the green flags—they’re the clues to emotional intelligence, maturity, and long-term compatibility. Dating is not just about avoiding the wrong person—it’s about recognizing the right one when they show up.If you have any thoughts to share, feel free to do it in comments.If you want to find more about dating, check it here.

Posted on: 9 April 2025 | 2:27 pm

Biochemistry of True Love

The work of researchers from Brook University in New York has proven: the statute of limitations for love does not exist. Using magnetic resonance imaging, specialists examined the chemical processes in the brain in young couples and couples who have lived together for more than 20 years. And it turned out that in every tenth pair the partners have the same passionate feelings for each other as at the very beginning of the relationship, regardless of how long their marriage lasts: after 10 and 20 years, the feelings of love for their chosen one remain unchanged.An analysis of brain activity has confirmed this. Scientists have found that in some representatives of older couples, when they see photographs of a partner, the same chemical reactions occur in the brain as in people in the early stages of falling in love. And although there is a very strong version in the scientific community that the chemical processes that determine the special state of lovers at the beginning of a relationship begin to subside after 15 months, and then completely disappear within ten years, not all, apparently, can only be explained by chemistry. True love does not subside and does not disappear.What, according to scientists, can be the beginning of a great and strong love?Open communication. This is not about excessive frankness: certainly, you should not lay out all your secrets before the first comer. But a smile, ease, sincerity and friendliness always find a response, such is human nature. Normally, it takes us several weeks or even months to somehow open up even to well-known people. But if you managed to talk to someone almost immediately and talk to yourself, it means that there is already a certain spark.Proximity Physical proximity to the object of attention plays a very important role, and it works much more effectively than flirting at a distance. If you liked someone at a party, just go up to him and stand by his side - this is better than smiling mysteriously and shooting your eyes through the room.Reciprocal feeling. In psychology, there is the concept of "resonance" - a phenomenon when the object of love begins to experience the same feelings as the subject. Simply put, the more we are sure that someone likes us, the more we like this person, which inevitably leads to emotional rapprochement.Common interests. We instinctively look for membership in a group, including a group of interests. At the same time, members of one group seem to each other more attractive - in every sense - than strangers. This evolutionary mechanism also works when meeting people: we instinctively look for a person with whom we have a lot in common. The more similar interests there are, the more chances there are to “attract” each other."Beach!" by [Satanus] is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Posted on: 20 June 2020 | 2:58 pm

What is the love at the first sight?

Love at first sight is a certain kind of narcissism, says Dr. Ben Jones from the Physiognomy Research Laboratory of the University of Aberdeen. At a meeting, any of us evaluates how interested one or another person is looking at him, and if we see that we are attractive to the opponent, then this person automatically becomes attractive to us. Dr. Jones believes that if at the first meeting you liked a person, then he will find you attractive. This is based on the social signal “I'm interested in you” - an open look and a smile.Oksana Deren, a psychotherapist at the Institute of Psychotherapy and Clinical Psychology, also explained that a person needs 90 seconds to make a choice of a partner, this time is used to compare the image of a stranger with the image of an ideal partner that has developed under the influence of cultural and social experience.460 men took part in the experiment with the assessment of attractiveness from photography. In the photographs, the man was looking at the lens or to the side. According to the results of the experiment, psychologists came to the conclusion that a “eye to eye” look with a smile makes a potential partner 8 times more attractive.Additional studies were conducted that showed that a keen look is an integral part of competition. In the next experiment, 60 girls and boys took part; they had to evaluate the attractiveness of a man with a neutral facial expression in the photo.At the next stage, the face of a woman interestedly looking at a man appeared in the photo. According to the results, it was determined that the attractiveness of men increased by 15% for girls, but for guys with the appearance of a female face, the image in the photo became much less attractive. According to the experiment, psychologists concluded that “popular” men are more interesting for women, but men see potential rivals in them.

Posted on: 8 June 2020 | 2:06 pm

Reasons Why Being In An Interracial Relationship Is Awesome

Reasons Why Being In An Interracial Relationship Is AwesomeAs we approach a new era where people are more accepting of things that were once considered outlandish and a sin, people are now accepting interracial relationships like they are accepting gay communities. With the help of the Internet, people are meeting other people from different parts of the world. They now have access to meet people of different racial backgrounds.Because of online dating, many people who are Latin, Asian, or White aredating black singles online . Moreover, dating interracial has many benefits that are why people consider this as an option when they date. Here are some reasons why being in an interracial relationship is awesome.Interracial Relationship Teaches MoreWhen in school, you are taught of the very basic of a certain culture. However, when you are interracially dating, you are given a non-tainted education about your partner’s race. You not only know their language but you also understand their norms and cultural behavior.You are likely more thrilled to learn his or her language than those who study that certain language in school. Your idea of his or her racial behaviors will not be considered as another stereotype belief but rather a much precise opinion. This will also be the case with your partner. You two will both understand each other’s racial background.You And Your Friends Speaks More Than Realist And ActivistsIf you are dating interracially, you are bound to hang out with your partner’s friends the same as your interracial partner is also bound to go out with your friends as well. Imagine if your friends and his or her friends hang out together with you. You will definitely create some squad goals with your group.Onlookers will definitely think to themselves “It’s nice to see people of different races enjoying each other company.”. They will be given the perspective and hope that people can live harmoniously despite being of different racial backgrounds. Your mixed race squad will give the people a preview of what it is like if all races are united.You Make Racism Less MeaningfulThere will be people who will always be racists. Whether it's because of history or some generalized notion, people will always incorporate stereotypes. These reasons further ignite the issue of miscegenation.However, with many people being in an interracial relationship put all of this criticism into naught. People will have an orthodox idea that dating interracially is not a sinful act. They will also understand that love sees no racial differences.Your Greatest Ally Is Him/HerThough your interracially dating, you are never exempted from racial discrimination and comments. Actually, you are likely to be the center of it. However, it is nice to know that you have an ally outside of your race, which is your partner.Your partner can defend you from those people who are the same race as he or she is. People will have an unbiased perspective on racial aspects from your partner about your race. Your partner will be your number one defender and comforter when facing racial discrimination because he or she understands you well.You Are Together Because Of Love And RespectThe reason why there is racial discrimination, police abuse, and so many more racial issues in this world is that people have no love and respect for each other. People use races like a caste system. One of the famous notions for this is your skin color. These are where the phrases “the whiter you are, the more high class you are” and “the darker your skin is, the lesser rights you have” come to light.However, you and your partner are not together because any of you is higher than the other or just to get on a higher class. You are not together to rebel against your race. You are together because you have love and respect for each other. You and your partner together showing that love and respect are what we need to end racial discrimination once and for all. With these many wonderful reasons, it is a no wonder why people choose to date interracially and fight for it. This is because they all aim for a better purpose which is a world with the unity of all races. A world unified with love and respect.

Posted on: 6 March 2018 | 7:00 am

Survival Relationships

When the people involved in the relationship realize that they cannot survive in it on their own, then the relationship becomes a survival relationship. The choice of partner is out of emotions and there is no match in personalities of the two. It involves both a physical and emotional relationship and the fulfilling of the basic requirements of a married life. These people are unlikely to share common interests and qualities because of which there is not much that holds together this relationship. Each person tries to provide the other person which the things he or she does not have which makes the relationship a desperate, clinging one. Sometimes the relation can also become hostile and abusive. In these relationships, the partners often abuse each other physically. The people involved become overwhelmed at any sign of affection and caring because of which they are not sure how to receive it. The partners are desperate to just have the other person around them even if they have to fight.  However, this kind of connection gives a much better feeling than being institutionalized. Because both the partners are scared to be alone, they desperately try to find a replacement the moment they get out of one relationship. This relationship turns out to be a co dependent one.

Posted on: 20 October 2014 | 10:00 pm

Pastime Relationships

The pastime relationships are generally meant for fun and recreation. There are hardly any expectations although some people allow themselves to attach hope with these relationships. Summer romance is a good example of this kind of relationship. The pastime relationship is not a long term relationship and the circumstances create an even low probability of the relationship being an enduring one. Only expectations with this relationship are those of passion, tenderness and delight.

Posted on: 20 October 2014 | 9:53 am

Avoidance Relationships

 In avoidance relationships, the people involved try to protect themselves from falling in deep intimate relationships with the other person and do not want to share their entire feelings with them. This relationship also includes those people who have just come out of a relationship and have not gotten over the painful feelings of failure and loss of splitting. The people whose life is overshadowed with traumatic events like death of a near relative, partner or a close friend are also a part of the group of people belonging to this category. They fear that if they get very close to the new person, the painful experience will surface again. The people specially choose those partners with whom they do not have to share the deeper feelings and emotions which they want to avoid.  Another important feature of this relationship is that the partner may be someone who does not fit into the person’s remaining life. The partner will not have the same importance and compassion as the previous partner did. In such cases, more emphasis may be given to sex as a means of controlling the painful emotions. The beginnings and endings of these relationships are often immediate. There is a low chance of self disclosure and a high amount of mistrust.

Posted on: 2 October 2014 | 5:44 pm

Experimental Relationships

  These relationships are just for trying out. In this relationship, a person who chooses his partners emotionally is made to choose partners who are extremely different than what he prefers. The motive of these experimental relationships is to find out the ways in which another person can be related to this person and what the relationship will become if this happens. These kinds of relationships help us in discovering new ways of interacting with each other, in ways we thought were not possible for us. It also helps in discovering those parts of one’s personality that are unknown to him and then nurturing them in order to develop them and grow. These relationships can be compared to dating which possess the quality of exploration and experimentation. The people involved in this relationship have an uncanny knack of striking a connection which clicks for the both of them and may even evolve further into a more dominant one. This type of relationship usually influences the choices of the person which help him in founding a suitable partner in the next relationship.

Posted on: 21 September 2014 | 10:04 am

Transitional Relationships

 In the transitional relationships, there is a cross between the new and the old, between the patterns that people were trying to change. This helps them in handling old conflicts and issues in a better way without causing any harm to the older relationship. The people involved in this relationship can also try to find out improved ways of relating to each other and developing their characters. It is a good way of practicing for a long term relationship which is much healthier than the older one, and can sometimes even evolve into a new relationship.  In case one of the members in the relationship gets deeply attached to the patterns of the older relationship or falls back into the same habits which led to the failure of the previous relationship, then the transitional relationship faces problems. Sometimes it even turns out to be like the relationship which led to this new relationship. This is called a transference relationship which is described later on. When the people involved in the transitional relationship have achieved their aims and worked out their problems, they can end it in a more efficient and caring manner.

Posted on: 16 September 2014 | 1:45 pm

Healing Relationships

 These relationships depict a period of stress, mourning, loss and struggle. The people in this relationship tend to feel fearful, dejected and wounded from inside. They do not have to be present at the same time and the same place for their mutual growth and development and quite rightly, they are not. They badly long for love and care from their partners and at the same time, they should retrospect their relation and assess themselves. These people are generally completely mismatched and do not share much in common. Their lack of fit includes their age difference which can be up to twenty years as well. These differences also involve the intelligence levels like I.Q., where a brilliant surgeon paired up with a ski instructor who is not very intelligent. The differences can also involve sexual behaviors and experiences or traumatic events in one’s past etc.   In these kinds of relationships, physical and emotional distance from each other can prove to a healing remedy. A person who gets divorced after fifteen years of marriage marries a person whose spouse had died prematurely. At that particular time, these two people needed each other very badly and wanted to be together, opposed to the contradicting views of their family and friends. Both these people got along well because they needed to be away from their traumas and also wanted each other’s comfort. Couples in the healing relationships want to talk about their previous experiences and about the difficult times they had to face along with struggles and losses. They try to repeat these events and relive the different levels when they try to understand each other and develop a sense of compassion. Instead of passion, support, kindness and gentleness are the healing weapons in this relationship. People involved in this relationship go for plenty of trips for recreation purposes and indulge with each other. It can be said that these relationships are more play oriented rather than being work oriented. Even if this relationship comes to an abrupt end, the ending is not painful and traumatic but supportive. It is possible for people to have two or even three healing relationships at the same time. In this case, one person is going through a healing stage where as the other is going through a transitioning stage.

Posted on: 10 September 2014 | 11:30 pm

Types Of Relationships

  Every person in this world has some relationships with the people whom he or she interacts with. These relationships are of different types. Almost everyone has at least a rough idea in mind as to how a relationship needs to be. We wish for happy and good relationships with everyone but it is not possible. We spend a great deal of our times pondering over the meanings of our relationships, trying to compare them with relationships of other people only to find out how our relationship should be like. More often than not, we decide that our relationship is not as good as the one we compare it with. Among couples, the one who does not get divorced might be seen as a successful relationship. But in reality, couples who enjoy a healthy and happy relationship are just a handful in number. People can have many kinds of relationships with others and one relationship has to go through a number of stages itself. That is why a given relationship may be healthy at one point of time but become sour at another stage. Some relationships we cannot choose, they are with us for our entire life. But there are some which depend on our choice. These relationships are of love and friendship. We tend to choose partners who are most likely to aid us in achieving our present and future needs, desires and expectations, and also help us in growing and working through our issues. By realizing this important aspect of a relationship, a couple can live a much healthier relationship by discovering new ways of living with each other.  At one time or the other, we must have come across couples who were completely mismatched and the most dissimilar in nature, but have learn how to live with each other and enjoy the moments spent together. Relationships are all about understanding. Yet there are some couples which indulge in mutual punishment and it is hard to imagine how they can survive with each other. Some of these couples might appear to be the perfect match for each other but end up divorced because of lack of commitment and understanding. We can make our relationships more supportive and nourishing by deepening and sharpening our understanding of the things that we do and the way we do them in a relationship. It also makes it less painful and toxic which increases the chances of the relationship becoming healthy. We will also be able to judge the extent of achievement in our relationship. A sharper and clearer picture of our existing relationships will help us in fulfilling our own needs as well as the others’ needs in a much better way.  We have described types of relationships in this article which are grouped equally into Collateral and Dominant categories. This type of grouping is essential in determining the patterns of different relationships which into which people enter and it is also useful in describing their behavior from inside. These categorizations or groupings helped people like students, workers and clients in understanding their relationships clearly. Many of them can relate these categories to themselves because they experience whatever it describes. These categories try to collect all the important elements o every relationship with the minimum amount of judgment. Using this technique, people can find out where they are going wrong and how to pull things back.    Types of relationships : Collateral - Healing Relationships - Transitional Relationships - Experimental Relationships - Avoidance Relationships - Pastime Relationships Dominant - Survival Relationships - Validation Relationship - Scripted Relationships - Acceptance Relationship - Individual Assertion Relationship - Transference Relationships - Mature Relationships - Romantic Relationship - Friendship - Siblings - Parents

Posted on: 9 September 2014 | 7:52 am

How To Attract Men ?

  Attracting men takes a little more effort than you would think. If you think you’re God’s gift to men and that you’re going to have to beat them away with a stick, you’re wrong.  All that is going to get you is a short term romance based on lust not love or worse, a one night stand. If you’re looking for something more than that, maybe we could shed a little light on the best way to end up with a blissful relationship.  Contrary to what people think is the stereotype; men want more than just physical beauty, they need substance also. Sure sometimes looks attract a man, but not for keeps. A few tips are:         Be comfortable with who you are. Everybody has faults, strive to be the best you can. Be confident in yourself and it will be your most attractive feature.         Smile. While it may not help you keep a man it will show that you are content and approachable.         While this may sound sexist, learn to cook. If you’re looking for a long blissful relationship, your man will want to eat. While eating out every night sounds fancy, it gets old real fast. Men still like women who are able to cook, I think it’s a mothers cooking thing.         Don’t act like the damsel in distress. Be a little self-reliant. In the long run men want a partner they can count on not someone they have to babysit.         Flirting. You may have flirted a little to get his attention. Well, don’t stop! Continue to show that you are interested. Flirting can keep that spark alive and keep that relationship vibrant for a long time.   This next piece of advice may sound old-fashioned but it’s still true. If you’re looking for a long term relationship, look for someone that you are compatible with, someone who is close to the same social status as you are. While it may sound romantic to marry the rich young doctor, unless you are close to the same educational and social status, the strain of the differences might eventually wear the relationship out. That kind of romance is best saved for novels.  Another piece of advice, which ties into the last paragraph is, be yourself. As in tip #1, be comfortable with who you are. Don’t try to pretend you are someone you’re not. Men will see through that fairly soon and will move on. If you’re confident with who you are men will see that and in turn they will feel more at ease and open up.  Learning how to attract men and end up with a better chance at a long and blissful relationship is not that hard. Think about what kind of person you really are, be the best you can and look for someone that can be happy with who you are.

Posted on: 3 September 2014 | 6:17 pm

Solutions To Common Marital Problems

  From my research and observation, most marital problems occur in relationships that are built on unrealistic expectations. Playing the blaming game and taking each other for granted are also big factors in causing marital breakdowns.   Remember the times when you were courting each other? How fascinated you were with your beloved on that first date? How your heart skipped a beat when our beloved is near. How elated you felt when you first held each other’s hands. And the sparkle in your eyes when he asked you out again. How often you waited for the phone to ring hoping it was him?   There is no doubt that there is enormous excitement during the courtship period. Then one day, you got married. And the romance died... Does romance always end with marriage? Of course not! In fact, romance should start with marriage. According to Zig Ziglar, one of the most sought after motivational speakers, he explained it this way...   It all boils down to our “marriage attitude.” He says, "Any marriage tends towards breakdown or will disintegrate unless we put in time, energy and effort into sustaining it. Also, marital problems are so prevalent because we commit a series of actions that kill the joy and love we once enjoyed."   If we think about it, what he said hits the nail on its head! So no matter how good the marriage is, we will have marital problems if we do not consciously make an effort to make it better or if we have bad habits. How To Save The Marriage?   If we recognize that we have a problem and want to save our relationships, we can start over by adopting a positive marriage attitude. As Ziglar explained, "Marriage is not a fence to hem you in; its a guardrail to protect what is inside." Its like when we went to climb Mount Kinabalu in East Malaysia. There were beautiful scenic views at very high and rocky areas in the mountain. And because it is very dangerous at the edge of these areas, guardrails were built to protect us from falling off. Isn’t it very much like marriage?  It is designed not to place restrictions on us but to safe guard us. According to Dr George Crane, the psychologist and physician - no matter how good or bad our relationships are, we sometimes have to... ‘Restart’ at the beginning If you have fallen out of love with your partner, go back and court like you did when you first fell in love. And...you will most likely fall in love. So lets start digging into... How we can ‘restart’ and overcome our marital problems -Respect your partner -Become each other’s best friend -Take time to plan more activities with your partner -Make the commitment to work on the relationship -Always help each other At the end of the day, what we women want from our husbands as Dr. Richard Furman puts it... Is somebody who listens, is understanding, is confident in himself, has security in his job, is dependable, is an achiever, is aggressive but with humility and is trying to make the marriage better. I wish to end by sharing a story about Sir Edmund Hillary, the first man in history to reach Mount Everest and his mountain guide, Tenzing.Tenzing managed to save Sir Edmund’s life by holding on tight to the rope that held both of them, from falling to their deaths. When interviewed later, Tenzing refused any special credit but explained it eloquently... “Mountain climbers always help each other.” Wouldn’t it be fantastic if we adopt this philosophy for our relationships? The world would have less marital problems!

Posted on: 14 August 2014 | 5:21 pm

6 Sensible Relationship Advice To Make Love On Distance Work

   Here are 6 sensible advice on how to make love on distance work. Love, people fall in and out of love every day. As we all know love is a complicated adventure. As if the notion of love is not hard enough, we have to make it even more difficult by engaging in a long distance relationship.   Long distance love requires a little extra consideration in some areas. Today with the explosion of online romances it pays to use a little common sense. Let’s explore some of those areas and see if we can shed some light on long distance love. • Take your time. In these stressful times many people are desperate for companionship and tend to jump into an online relationship too quickly. Take your time and get to know that person. Long distance love, even more than a local relationship requires patience. Don’t throw yourself in too quick and risk being hurt. If it’s meant to be a little extra time will not hurt. In fact it can only make the relationship deeper. • Don’t pretend to be more than you really are.  Be honest. I know it’s human nature to want to appear desirable to the other sex but, lying is not the way. If you intend to have a real, lasting and meaningful relationship with this person, someday you will meet. You want the other person to be honest with you, right? • Keep your jealousy and suspicions in check. It’s easy to start to wonder what the other person is doing when you can’t see them. But remember, they have a life, friends and responsibility just like you. Just because you don’t know exactly where they are and with who, doesn’t mean they are doing something wrong any more than you are. • Don’t read more into things than is there. If given the chance the other person will most likely explain things if you don’t accuse them immediately. Chill out and wait before you make a fool of yourself. •   Block time out to actually talk to each other, especially in a long distance relationship, not just emails or texts. Just as if the other was just down the street work out a schedule to talk with them over the phone and not be interrupted or busy with other things. That will make them feel like they’re not that important, second choice. Texts or email are great as little “love notes” but, it’s not a substitute for a human voice with all the emotions it can hold. • Have fun. Don’t be too serious all the time; you can doom this long distance relationship before it even has a chance. Remember the other person is basing their feelings for you what they’re hearing on the phone. If you sound depressed or are full of problems every time you talk, your love one is not going to look forward to your calls for very long.

Posted on: 22 June 2014 | 7:53 pm

Tips To Find Lasting Relationship With The Right Partner

  Every year thousands of couples make the choice to get married. At the same time, thousands of other couples make the choice to get divorced. When it comes to love and relationships, is it really possible to find one special person to spend the rest of your life with.       Is it Love or Just Compatibility?   As people mature from being teenagers to adults, they often feel the need to find the right person and settle down. This feeling can be enhanced if all of their friends are forming lasting relationships. The urge to find a mate at a certain age often causes people to choose partners who they feel compatible with. This feeling is not the same as love and can fade quickly when the two discover they do not have any interests in common.   On the other hand, it is possible for two people to start out as friends and have a lasting relationship develop into love. Most couples who stay married for long periods of time, find they are friends with the person they chose to partner with.        Is Your Love Based on Physical Attraction?   While people want to be physically attracted to the one they choose to have a relationship with, physical attraction should not be confused with love. Long term love requires dedication on the part of each member in the relationship. This dedication orcommitment rarely stands on physical attraction alone. People who find they constantly choose the wrong mate, should consider what criteria they use when deciding who to go out with. If physical appearance is at the top of the list, chances are they are not choosing people with substance to their character.         Create a Detailed List of Desirable Traits   Anyone looking to develop a long term relationship should start by making a list of the characteristics and traits they would like their ideal mate to have. These characteristics should include some of the more important interests of the person creating the list. For example, if someone is a sports enthusiast and gets involved with someone who is not, this conflict of interests could create a problem.   On the other hand, people should have their own interests and not need to spend all of their time together. Some of the best relationships are between people who lead fulfilling lives and share their fulfillment with each other when they spend time together. The desirable traits should include any long term goals for the relationship. This would include whether or not to have children or to own a house.   The bottom line for creating a long lasting relationship based on love is to become a self-assured individual who is not looking for someone else to complete their life. It is also a good idea to meet new people in locations other than the traditional bar scene. Become involved in groups which share your interests or volunteer. This is the best way to meet people who will share the same interests, goals and desires that you have.

Posted on: 20 May 2014 | 3:49 pm

15 Great Date Ideas To Impress And Excite Your Loved One

  Our reader shared this useful article with us. It contains useful hints which can help you to improve your relationships and cheer up your partner.   Inspiring great date ideas. It was at a wedding dinner. A friend of the newly wed shared with the audience dating ideas to help keep the romance going even after the glow has long faded.   Of course I took as many notes as I can, hoping that it would also inspire my husband of 25 years to take action to keep the candle burning. But before I share the ideas here, there are questions to ponder upon before diving into action. • What is the personality type of your partner? • Is he/she outgoing or more of an introvert? • What activity does he/she like to do, shop or chill out in the park or immerse himself in the beauty of the paintings in the muzuem? • Does he/she like the sun of afraid of getting sun-burnt? • Does he/she like activities full of adrenaline flow or something calmer? Answering the above questions might save you lots of unnecessary conflicts and misunderstanding. It also shows that you have put much thoughts into making the date a great one. Which in itself is pretty impressive.   Here are the 15 activities that I personally adore: • Play table-tennis, or badminton, golf or whatever games that both of you enjoy. • Learn to dance together. • Go on short holiday trips. • Take a walk in the park or garden. • Picnic by the beach or go for a swim. Visit Guilin in China, full of beautiful untouched landscape springing with surprises at every location. - beautiful parks, hills, caves. • Go to the spa and relax. • Take language classes and learn how to sing romantic praises to him. • Go shopping and pick up a romantic item for each other. • Cook together and impress with your culinary skills. • Watch a movie and have dinner thereafter. • Take pictures of your beloved in the park, in the garden, in the shopping mall. Wherever that you both enjoy hanging out. • Visit the muzuem. • Play indoor games like monopoly, charade, pictionary. • Have coffee at a relaxing restaurant or alfresco style where you just watch people go by. • Take a bicycle ride around your neighborhood and just enjoy the moment. There you go.

Posted on: 13 May 2014 | 1:59 pm

How To Act Like Lady, Think Like Man

  There are several ways to go with this subject. Exactly what does act like a lady mean? By whose standard are we measuring what being a lady means? What you may think is acting like a lady is totally different from my experience. The same can be said for “think like a man”. By whose standard are we measuring that? If we take the historical view of society, to act like a lady means; to be submissive, emotionally, polite, nurturing and attractive. To think like a man means; to be head of household, a leader, provider, logical and dependable.  Well, let’s explore a few ways you can act like a lady and think like a man: Tip 1:  Don’t beat around the bush. When most men have something to say they just blurt it out and usually without thinking of the consequences. Well if you want to think like a man but act like a lady you should develop this skill but with a twist, say what you mean without a lot of drama but use your lady like politeness when you do it. Tip 2:  Don’t be afraid to take charge. It is commonly expected for men to take charge of a situation and for women to take a backseat role. Don’t be afraid to take the lead. You may feel unsure of yourself but guess what? Most men are unsure and that never stopped them! Tip 3:   Be logical. It is commonly assumed that men make logical decisions while women make decisions based on emotions. Well there is nothing wrong with a blend of both. Make decisions based on what you know is the right answer but temper that with just a touch of lady like emotion. Tip 4:  Don’t worry. Men tend to not spend a lot of time worrying about the details; they just like to take action. So if you want to think like a man, don’t worry, just get moving and get it done. Tip 5:  Don’t be afraid of conflict. Women get stereotyped as being afraid of workplace conflicts while men take the view, It’s just business. Don’t be afraid to stand your ground, it’s not personal; it’s just part of getting the job done. Tip 6:  Don’t over think your wardrobe. Men don’t spend a lot of time and worry over their looks. Yes, men want to look good, but it’s not something they fret over. Men don’t dress for work to attract someone; they dress for authority and to get the job done. Tip 7:  Sex. Society tends to expect men to be the aggressor concerning sex. Why? What you have is just as important as what he has. Don’t be afraid to go for what you want, don’t wait to be chosen. Do the choosing instead. Tip 8:  Be steady. This, in a man’s world means being someone whose attitude and ethics are a known commodity. Be a person whom others don’t have to wonder how you will react. Tip 9:  Goals. Most men go into the working world with a goal in mind to rise to the top. Sadly, much of society has relegated women to a support role. Don’t accept that! Make goals! Tip 10:  Be better. Don’t just think like a man and act like a lady, be better than that. Take the good points from both sides; add a female twist and come up with a course of action better than “How to act like a lady and think like a man”.

Posted on: 4 May 2014 | 3:11 pm

What Men Are Afraid Of ? Top 10 Fears Of Men

  It is commonly thought that men are the strong sex and they are not afraid of nothing and never , and that they always are cold-blooded in any situation . However the reality is different . Men are even more vulnerable than women , but they hide their weaknesses . Each man has a fear . Here you'll find 10 major phobias of men .   1. To do something wrong Each man has a situation when he is afraid of doing something wrong . Simply saying " to be screwed up ". It can be connected with carreer , money , personal life , etc . Sometimes he fears to blurt something out of place or fail , making a joke : it can hurts his self-esteem and ,thus, unsettle .   2.Changes Very often men are conservative , they are afraid of changes .Even if a representative of a strong sex knows that this changes will be useful , the fear of changing exists : what if something will go wrong .   3.Critisism Men mostly don't like critisism , though ,they try to show that they don't care . In fact , one wrong word and one quizzical glance are able to undermine man's self-confidence .   4.His entourage don't like his girlfriend Many men are really scared about the fact that their newly chosen girl may not be liked by his friends and family .Try , if it is possible , to fing common with his friends and relatives .   5.Losing of status and state Each man , it doesnt mean how strong and brave he is, deep inside are afraid of loosing status and state , especially, if the have amassed it by themselves . At a slightest hint of problems in this area he may panic and react by unpredictable actions.   6.Female suprimacy Man not only want to be strong , but he is also obsessed by leadership. Men is very hurted when his fiancee is greater than he is : for example , when she earns more than he does , or has reached a significant height in her career .Even if you understand that you became better than your partner , try to not show it to him .   7.Woman's tears A man can stoically endure our tantrums, but the appearance of sweeping woman is able to drive him to a strange feeling . He can immediately to feel himself guilty and unworthy . For this reason it is not recommended to use tears as a way of manipulating , try to use more human ways .   8.Female unfaithfulness We know , that our men are incredible owners and even a small thought that their women can go to a bad with someone else is able to bring them to madness.Any hints on the infidelity of men's fiancee can be perceived very painfully , so if you want to make him jealous do it with extreme caution and do not overplay. 9.Impotence The worsest nightmare of a man : his precious sexual power leaves him . If it happens ( Oh , horror ). It will wound his honor , pride and dignity , his own ego .   10.Wedding Wedding - it is a dream of each woman and a big fright of many man .Already mentioned fear of changes , fear of being unable to protect and provide own family , fear of losing passion and romantic , as well as freedom , fear of losing "private life" - all of that makes a potential spouse to delay marriage for an indefinite period . To the question of marriage we should approach with extreme caution : do not insist and blackmail , just intelligently and gradually touch up a man to the secret of marriage proposal

Posted on: 22 September 2013 | 1:20 pm

Criteria Of Attractiveness

  American psychologists  found that men are much more in agreement with each other on the issue of attractiveness of the opposite gender , than women .  This is a conclusion they came as a result of the study , which was attended by more than 4,000 volunteers of both sexes aged 18 to 70 years.   The subjects were evaluated photographs of persons of the opposite gender in terms of attractiveness. The authors of the study asked members to characterize people in the photo on the criteria: seductiveness , self-confidence , subtlety , sensuality, elegance, splendor of forms - for women, muscularity , masculinity , unusual appearance - for men and style , grooming and positive - for both sexes.   As a result , it was found ,that the judgments of female attractiveness of men were based primarily on the physical features of their appearance and they put higher valuation to slim ,seductive and looking  confidently ladies .   As for  women, most of them indicated slender and muscular men , but were not unanimous to their degree of attractiveness. Those men in the photo, which some participants of the experiment reported as very attractive , some other ladies seemed completely unsympathetic.   The authors of the study , which results were published in the journal "The Psychological Science", maintain that , depending on the age of the volunteers  their priorities were changing in the evaluation of appearance : overaged subjects were more sympathetic to positive, smiling people.

Posted on: 12 September 2013 | 12:10 pm

9 Terrible Phrases That Enrage Your Men

   Despite their external power and equanimity , many men are quite vulnerable. Sometimes a  harmless from women's point of view phrase can harm them . Here are the most dangerous phrases that unsettle , annoy and insult the man. Memorize them and never use if you want to keep the relationship as well as save his and your own nerves . 1. "Your football - is nonsense ! " For each man  his passion - is sacred. And no matter what he likes   : football , fishing , or computer "shooter" games - it is a part of his life, bringing him precious pleasure. Saying something against your dear companion, you run the risk to turn automatically into an enemy number 1.   2 . " Let's not " If a man wants to talk to you , and you walk away from the conversation, leaving him dissatisfied with a similar phrase , it usually leads to quarrels and omissions . Men , are not mind readers , like all of us  , so if you do not like something , it is better to explain it and to talk heart to heart .   3 . " We need to talk " Or : "I have a serious talk to you ," etc. There are phrases that instantly adjust interlocutor on negative mood. Especially if between them and the conversation itself should take some time imagine the condition of the man who will suffer all day worrying with uncertainty.   4 . " But my mom said that ..." Undoubtedly ,  parents - great authority , but if you continually refer to the opinion of your mother , a man may feel like he does not live with you , but with her . Talk to your mom , ask her for advice - this is, of course , there is nothing to be ashamed of , but when you argue with your husband  do not refer to it .   5 . "I'm ugly / fat /  cook bad" Do not criticize yourself in the presence of men ,  the stronger sex , as a rule , tend to believe on what they hear from us, and if you're constantly repeating to your beloved that  you are fat , then eventually it will all take a closer look closely to your body shape . If we talk  to man about ourselves , try to talk  only about  advantages - conversations about disadvantages leave for friends.   6. "Why are you so ugly dressed ? " Sometimes we don't understand the taste of men , and they - ours. This is quite normal and even natural phenomenon . Hearing from you direct criticism of his style , he is likely to perceive it as your usual " discontent by everything ." Instead of this , go with him to  shops and gently tell him what , to your mind , will suits him .   7. "Don't look at her like that ! " As is well known since the time of the primitive communal system , by nature men - are  hunters , so one glance at the outside pretty girl does not mean anything . It is a mistake to imagine right out of his companion's insidious " traitor to the motherland " and mentally to file for divorce. Such views are generally views and an end, so is it worth to raise a panic ? In addition, the  behavior of the man shows that he is still sexually active : that's a plus . If  it hurts you  too much , try to give back to him by the same coin : just look at other boys , when he sees it .   8. "You will not do that " Variations : " This case is not serious ," " You're wasting your time for nothing ," "You can't do that ," etc. Undermine confidence in the man himself and develop his complex - probably the worst thing a woman can do . Even if you are very skeptical of what was intended by your partner , try to reconsider your point of view or at least don't tell it to him . In the end, time will tell which is which. Try to give maximum support to the favor , to help him by word and deed , more often say nice things to him .   9. " But my ex in comparison with you ... " This phrase - is a killer of relations. Men hate to be disadvantageous compared to the "former ", especially when it is connected with sex . Never say such things to your men , even if your ex was even  better than you man is .

Posted on: 6 September 2013 | 3:36 pm

Love and Drugs - Is There A Connection

                                        Arthur Aron , a scholar of the New York Center of Psychology , explored such strong feelings as love and passion , and made some interesting conclusions ...    Many of us depend on different things . Habits include a variety of things and events - from the regime of the day to his favorite mug of tea we drink . We begin to feel uncomfortable when forgo anything out of the usual . We are getting used to and feel the need , as in a drug addiction. According to the latest research can be attributed to drugs and an emotional expression as love.    This is confirmed by the fact that our brain is the center that receives and processes the feelings caused by a romantic relationship . This center is activated when drug are used . That is, our brain perceives love like a drug . The gray matter in this case evokes an emotional response that is responsible for reward and motivation. To paraphrase , we can say that we choose a partner , and our brain starts to be motivated so that we begin to create, to work hard and do absolutely unexpected things .    Even if you turn to painting, poetry, music and other art forms , the most of the masterpieces were created at the peak of the emotional state of their authors. So we are subconsciously trying to commit deeds to satisfy the object of adoration. According to one of the scientists neurological center Lucy Brown of Albert Einstein : " A man in love can be totally happy , but quite often a feeling of happiness accompanied by a feeling of anxiety ." She also argues that a sufficient stimulation of this part of the brain prompts us to have sex . In New York the center of psychology Arthur Aron concluded: "The love and passion , as well as drugs , activate the same region of the brain ." Such  psychologists' approval  came by examining magnetic resonance images of the brain of ten women who were in love .

Posted on: 3 September 2013 | 3:37 pm